A Culture Bent on Disconnection

A Culture Bent on Disconnection

By Ed Vasicek

What did the nearsighted porcupine say as it inadvertently backed into a cactus?   "Pardon me, honey!"

When it comes to being socially connected, some of our social skills or levels of approachability may mimic that of a cactus. Some folks are anything but inviting.

Welcome to another installment from our "Social Connectedness" series.  If you are just joining us, relax: each article is meant to stand on its own.  We have thus far discussed how a lack of social connectedness harms us personally and collectively.   I have offered several suggestions to help us move in a more connecting direction: cut television viewing way down, read the community paper, and simplify life, making time to socialize.   Today's suggestion is this: selectively embrace or reject the trends of popular culture.

Our society is regressing.  We are seeing fewer groups of intertwined people, while the number of isolated individuals is escalating.   I am persuaded that anti-social cultural trends reinforce this degeneration, so join me as we mull over some of these.

1. Language deficit.    As families become more dysfunctional, social skills decline. A number of school counselors are noting a rise in "language deficit." Some parents rarely converse with their children but use the television as a nanny.  The result: children recognize but do not grasp the meaning of COMMON words.   

I have experienced this phenomenon first hand.   One day, a couple of kids (maybe 8 or 9 years old) asked me, "What is this toy made from?"

"It's made of metal," I offered.

"Metal?  What's metal?" they inquired.  Neither child knew what metal was!    Since children learn the art of conversation from parents, it is no wonder some kids are incapable of meaningful discussion.

2. Clothes and styles that say, "Keep away unless you are my kind." At the checkout counter, I noticed a young, heavily tattooed man attired in an obnoxious tee shirt; he muttered only a syllable to the gal at the checkout counter.    I thought to myself, "Everything about this guy says, 'Stay away from me.'"

A person with spikes, tattoos, jewelry in strange places, etc., may not be anti-social.    Personality, values, convictions and deportment are not always consistent, and I have known some wonderful people who dress in far-out ways; we need to assess each person individually.   But collectively, deportment styles indicate the current state or direction of a society.

Although young people have traditionally sought "peer identification" through clothing, it wasn't until the 1960's that clothing took on an additional purpose: REPULSION.  The up and coming generation sought to EXCLUDE anyone over 30.    The greasy long hair and dirty Levis sent out a message:  "Leave me alone, outsider."

It is no coincidence that the Baby-boom generation was the first of the socially declining generations, less likely to vote, stay married, join a club, or have friends over for a card party.   And the entropy escalates with each generation.

The way we dress often presents us as approachable or unapproachable, friendly, formal, or frightening.   Let's encourage young people to find current styles that help them blend in while simultaneously portraying a message of approachability.

3. Hate music.   A lot of rap music and a fair amount of rock music can be classified as anti-social, encouraging hatred, crime, violence, and social isolation.  Please note, I did not say "all."  The simplest way to analyze music is to evaluate the words and character of the musicians who produce it.   

Listening while not paying attention to lyrics is dangerous: it results in a sort of brainwashing.   Mindless listening bypasses the conscious mind, and bizarre lyrics that should be rejected by the conscience are ushered to the brain completely unfiltered.  The result: individuals become de-sensitized to violence, suicide, sexual abuse, occultism, and anarchy.   This creates a depressive, negative attitude toward life.  Coarse and vulgar language are viewed as mainstream.  Such music has the potential to pave the way for violence, cults, promiscuity, and even suicide.

Our task is to be selective and creative, hybridizing and forming our own friendly, decent culture.